It’s like all I can do is keep writing this gibberish to keep from breaking apart.

I'm slightly off kilter, and everyone seems to know.

But I'm not mad that they think that.

I know that I brought this all on myself.

I just wish there was some way to make it up to everyone.

I'd do anything not to be this way.

But I know I deserve this.

I just wish that someone would tell me what's wrong with me.

If they could just tell me how to be different in a way that makes sense.

So this will all go away and disappear.

I know that's wrong because it's my responsibility.

And I'm told that things have to get worse before they can get better but this is a worse that just feels to big.